I had planned on continuing this thought but once again disruptions have been intrusive. The major one being the fact that the lawyers, reviewing my present manuscript. sent it back asking me to rewrite a couple of areas. It is the fear of being libelous. I am amazed but also respectful of their concerned. I had used fictitious names for everyone in my book. Every story is absolutely true, although not all are flattering to others or myself. So, suddenly I was forced into re-reading and editing my entire 21-chapter manuscript. I hope to finish that tonight for the last time.
I will add one last thought to the topic of sadness, although I lost my original thought.
I want to talk about depression. Depression is to sadness as cancer is to a wart. Those who have ever experienced true, clinical depression don’t have any idea what it is like. It is a disorder of mood and perception. The disorder of perception is best illustrated through the act of suicide. When someone takes their life, it is when their perception is so warped that they see no value left in their life for themselves or for the people who love them.
Depression is rarely the result of one’s own sin. While behavior and wrong thinking can worsen depression the cause is most often related to genetics and life experiences. The life experiences that accompany clinical depression is most often horrible experiences as a child when the depressed person was an innocent victim.
Can our bad behavior be part of the problem? Yes, absolutely. One of the worse aggravators of depression is self-medication through using substances that have the potential of being addictive (alcohol or others). Allowing yourself to continue thinking negatives thoughts such as “I am worthless . . . no one loves me . . . I am a loser” is not constructive.
In most Christian, at least evangelical, circles depression has to be hidden, because, there is a real stigma if you are depressed . . . it is your fault and a spiritual failure. They feel this way (those who hold this stigma) because if they have never struggled with depression, they feel superior as if they have earned the position of not being depressed by being so obedient.
As I said in my last post that I don’t think I have a high tendency towards depression but I have had at least two serious episodes. I consider then serious when suicide enters my thoughts and the way out seems elusive.
Because of these bad experiences, I am cautious when I am sad. I want to experience the sadness in its fullness (rather than living in denial) however, I know the black hole of depression is surrounded by a slippery lip like a funnel.
I really worry about those who say they are never sad because they are a Christian. That means that they live in a world that is not in contact with reality.