I write a lot about the declining church in America, and that’s where my heart is, with those who are leaving. I have no qualms with those who enjoy American Christian culture just the way it is. But my purpose is to relate to those who are leaving, to explain why they feel the way they do, and to find a form of faith that works for them. Not a false faith, such as Christian Nationalism, or a post-modernist view that there is no truth.

I do want to mention that after a two-decade-long rapid decline in American Christianity, as measured by church attendance or self-identification as “Christian,” the decline has plateaued in the post-COVID era. I sense that it is only a temporary change. However, I read another article this week in the New York Times that examined in greater detail why Christianity may not be declining as rapidly as before. It is due to young men.

Men have historically been the least churched group. However, over the past four years, men’s interest in participating in a church has exceeded women’s. The caveat to that is that the churches that these men are choosing are the Orthodox, Episcopalian, and Catholic churches, those with a higher church form. It appears that the driving force behind this change is that men have historically been lonely, and COVID-19 exacerbated that problem to the point that they are seeking to be part of something larger than themselves.

This intersects with my writing about the church and mental health. There is an excellent opportunity for churches to provide community for people, especially these lonely men. Even the worst of churches, like the one I grew up in, offers a good service of community.

I think, and I know some women disagree with me, that men uniquely struggle with community. Men are more insecure, and that insecurity breeds competitiveness. Even within Christian circles, men compete to see who is most spiritual. I’ve observed how nurturing my wife Denise’s friends are to her. They don’t hesitate to tell her how good she looks, how hard she works, how smart she is, and the list goes on.

In the world of men, they will never tell another man if they look good because of their homophobia, or if they admire the man in any way, due to this competitive nature. Listen to men at a party or in a bar bragging about their successes.

If churches want to capitalize on winning these men back, they need to make it a safe place and, as I’ve been saying, a place of encouragement, not judgment and criticism.

I am still concerned, however, as most of these polls (such as Pew) simply examine church attendance. I’ve witnessed a great migration among church attenders, away from the simple message of the historical Jesus to something that you can arguably claim is no longer Christian.

It is with great hesitation that I discuss who is and isn’t a Christian because people might confuse me with the dogmatist who, for three decades, has tried to explain (or accuse) me of not being a Christian, or at least a very good one. But those claims are based on “doctrines” of Christian culture, such as the age of the earth, evolution, women teaching men, the evilness (as they claim) of homosexuality, and a plethora of other things that are extracted from the Bible with great imagination and ill will.

My approach to who is or isn’t a follower of the historical Jesus is not a moral accusation or a matter of dogma, but an academic, rational determination based on the meanings of the words “following the teachings of Jesus.”

As I’ve said here, the simple essence of Jesus’ teaching was the value of factual truth, to deny your own selfish will, even to the point of hardships, and to love others as yourself. Paul goes on to recommend that Christians meet, rather than avoid meeting, to encourage one another. Everything else is extraneous. Not evil, but simply not a mandated part of Christian living. There are benefits to certain Christian human institutions, although not essential. My church undertakes many service projects, some of which I try to participate in. These are good programs. While not mandated, they are a good outlet for loving others, which is mandated.

So, when I write about the internal migration away from the teachings of Jesus, I am speaking of what is happening in the conservative church, where Christians are leaving those forementioned teachings of Jesus, for a political identity that is the antithesis of the teachings of Jesus, self-centers, power hungry (Christian nationalism), and hatred, such as for gays, Muslims, immigrants, “abortionist,” and “liberals.”

On the liberal side, there is a migration away from the historical Jesus and his teachings toward a nebulous spirituality. This movement is empowered by postmodernist spiritual leaders, who have abandoned factual truth in favor of personal, subjective truth that “works for you.” Whether or not Jesus actually lived in history, left sandaled footprints along the shore of the Sea of Galilee, and spoke about morality is irrelevant to this new spirituality. When you give up on the notion of factual truth, you will eventually have to give up on the idea of meaning and morals, just like the atheists. You can only say that racism is wrong if you believe that Jesus existed and that he was representative of the godhead, who has said in space and time that unloving behavior, including racism, is bad.

Returning to the mental health perspective, when these young men, or anyone, come to the church in search of community, morals, and meaning, if they are handed a nebulous spirituality or a self-centered political philosophy, it is like what Jesus said, as recorded in Luke, chapter 11:11-12 “Which of you fathers, if your son asks for[a] a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion?”

Have a happy holiday, and I pray that all of us will find encouragement in the New Year.

Mike