Ramblings: Happy Birthday Denise!

Today is a big birthday for Denise. I am at a loss for words in trying to find a way to celebrate this on paper. During our 37 years of marriage, this year would have to be the most challenging one for her. She had to face (and must continue to consider) the possibility of  being widowed. She has been at my side during my 2-week hospitalization at Peace Health and was at my side, almost every day, during my 2-week + hospitalization at the University of Washington. She suspended her career and came and lived with me in Seattle for over two months during my out-patient treatments.

Neither of us have ever fully understood the depth of love and commitment as we have this year. I would have to say, I would not be here now if it were not for her. Even if her care wasn’t what kept me alive, her presence in my life is what kept me from wanting to take my own life when my days were so miserable.

I carry guilt for what my disease has done to her. I would never have wanted our marriage to go though something like this as I’ve always wanted to be a “blessing” to her, rather than a curse. But it is what it is and there is nothing we can do about that.

I pray that this year of her life will end up, somehow, being her best.

5 thoughts on “Ramblings: Happy Birthday Denise!

  1. Happy Birthday to Denise!! I’m sure she would do it all over again in order to increase the odds she gets to have more time with you. Remember, “for better or worse, in sickness and in health?” All my love to the two of you.
    Kristi

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  2. Happy Birthday Denise. Praying that this next year will be easier and easier and Mike’s health will be better and better!!!!🙏🙏 You are definitely a blessing in Mikes life and I’m sure any lives you have touched!!

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  3. You clearly are a blessing in her life or her devotion to you would not be there!! I’m sorry you feel guilty..feelings are hard to manage sometimes. But I hope you will soon understand that none of this is something you had a say in but happy you have a wonderful person in your life as devoted as Denise. Happy Birthday to her and we are all still praying strongly for your entire family!

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